The thing I've found with anxiety is that it's a bit of a silent creeper. Slowly and quietly, little by little it sneaks up on you until you are in its grasp!  

It might start out masquerading as the usual butterflies or nerves that everyone experiences naturally as they go about their life. Feelings are there to alert us to situations, good, boring and potential threats. But when you start getting a fight or flight response in a work or personal setting or constant strange thoughts then things are definitely not what they should be.

They're supposed to help us, not control us and definitely not dictate the way we live on a daily basis. 

Learning how to control my feelings (without making out like I'm a robot) has been a total game changer for me in how I can manage my anxious feelings. 

For a really loooong time I didn't have any feelings other than anxiety. It took quite a whie before it dawned on me that I was feeling a bit numb but once I had realised, I was quite distressed by it.

It took probably 2 and a half years and the birth of my first daughter for things to start coming back. I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to love the baby and it was only through pregnancy yoga classes where I was able to focus entirely on the baby and not on how I was feeling that I was able to get some return of other feelings. 

Waking up at 3am that first night in hospital with my hours old baby was thrilling when I could actually feel a surge of love for her. I think that's possibly why I felt like super woman after 40 hrs of labour and eventual assisted delivery! 

 

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